A Blossoming Mess- Finding Confidence, Control, and Vision by Peyton Olivia Photography
Life can be a bit hectic, can’t it? Sometimes I feel like I have all the time in the world to do what I strive to do, but then in a blink of an eye I feel overwhelmed and all my time is gone.
With this struggle, I have determined it all comes down to 3 things: a solid vision, self control, and confidence. If those three things aren’t in place, things will not get done. If you have a solid vision of what you want to achieve then all the planning is already done and you have determined exactly what you want. The next step is putting it into action, not just leaving it was a vision (a thought). To achieve this plan, you need self control and confidence. Self control is more than telling yourself “no”. Self control is about telling yourself, “You can do it,” and “Yes” as well. Self control applies when you desperately want to do anything else but work on your vision. If you can master self control, then you are able to conquer anything. If you are able to tell yourself these things, you have also embraced self confidence (one of the hardest things to overcome). Allowing yourself to succeed shows self confidence and believing in yourself! It all seems self explanatory but wow, life can be hectic, can’t it?
As an artist, I find it hard to focus on one thing at a time. Especially when it comes to running my own business. It’s easy to get put down, have your dreams crushed, or have envy take over your confidence and vision.. But with a little self TLC, I am able to find clarity in my decisions and actions. I recently found time to rummage through my older files and I found something I have forgotten about: fun…creativity….and freedom. Before I started my own business in photography, I was photographing everything and everyone. I would create time for personal photoshoots and artistic expression. Finding these images made me feel happy… alive…. and free again. I think it’s important for business owners, who started for fun not money, need to bring this aspect back into their lives before they burn out. We need to step back from thinking about business, business, business, and think about why we started in the first place. It’s as simple as finding your roots again.
Going back through my older images I realized where my roots started; My roots started with artistic expression (not weddings or paid portrait sessions). If I was feeling depressed, or feeling ecstatic, I would photograph something to portrait those feelings. If it was Spring and the flowers were out, I would photograph them. If it was snowy and white and cold outside, I would document those feelings through photography. I was and am a creator, a feeler, a director, an artist.
The photo series featured is from a personal photo shoot/ idea I had back in 2016, right out of college. It was early spring and I went to a local farmers market and bought some veggies and fruit. Our kitchen table was black at the time (I think I might get another one now that I think about it) and I would use it for flat-lay designs, food set ups, and still lives. I took the produce I had purchased from earlier and put it on my black table with a few branches from nearby cherry blossoms, some twigs, flowers, and a few dead plants from the previous harsh winter. With this beautiful mess I then photographed a still life in my apartment kitchen using only side window light. With these free, natural items I was able to create a series I would cherish for quite awhile. It was fun and I photographed it because I wanted to. No point to it at all - I merely did it for the idea and fun of it.
I guess my point is: don’t forget who you are even if business seems like it’s taking over your life. Remember why you love what you do, before you burn out, and acknowledge it. Make time for what you love, aside from business, and do it! I wish every artist the best in balancing business and personal goals. It will and can be done.
